So I live in Lekki. And to some the very word conjures up pictures of massive villas with swimming pools and tennis courts. These people have obviously never been there. Yes there might be a few such carbuncles but mostly it is full of middle class people trying to earn a daily crust. I can't say an "honest" daily crust of course because this is Nigeria and some people might be offended to be addressed in such a manner. But we are all trying to earn our daily crust.
Unfortunately in Nigeria no matter how much you try to earn your daily crust with as much dignity and honour as possible invariably some fools will step in and ruin it for you - be it PHCN, Tax collectors, Water company, Resident's association etc. When all you want is to wake up in the morning, go to work, do a good day's job (ok, ok - just go to work) and then come home and rest your weary head on your beloved's bosom (assuming your wife is not around) (it's just a joke..Please!!!) invariably you will be frustrated (no pun intended) in this simple routine of daily life.
For the past two and a half years the thorn in our well padded side has been a company called HiTech. It is funny how these companies always pick names that are a total opposite of what they really are. So anyway HiTech has been charged to build a road from law school in VI to somewhere way out into places that have no interest for me - that is beyond VGC. In corporate lingo they have won the bid for the concession to build the Lekki-Epe expressway. Whatever.
What interests me however is the bit of road between Lekki Phase 1 and ExxonMobil. (Yes I am Nigerian and yes I am selfish and parochial. And so?) A stretch of say one mile. Pardon me if I am wrong but geography was never my strong suit. All that stuff about north,south, east and west when really all you need to know is - is it close to Tantaliser? Which side is Zenith bank? Is there one yellow woman like this selling recharge cards on the corner? Based on these non scientific identifiers I have managed to survive to a rope old age but I digress.
Now having moved back to Nigeria two years ago I had thought that by now this small stretch of roadworks would be complete by now bearing in mind that they had started even before I moved back, but no, the torture continues. So daily life for us lucky ones in Lekki Phase 1 is like this. Wake up really early, sit in traffic for about one hour just to join the traffic on the main Lekki Expressway. Sit in Lekki Expressway traffic for another hour by this time irritable, irrational and prone to occasional bouts of fisticuffs and gesticulations to all and sundry. Arrive at destination emotionally ragged and raining curses on all those involved in building this god forsaken road. The trip I describe above is just the one my girls go through every morning to get to school. A fifteen minute drive turns into a two hour ordeal. They have a friend who lives in somewhere called Ajah who has to leave home at 530am to get to school. Then repeat the whole thing in the evening. This has been going on for TWO YEARS. Haba wetin?
So can someone explain to me the objective of this badly managed fiasco? Where is the Project plan? Who is the Project Manager? Every time the road is covered in tarmac and we take a deep breath we are invariably met a month later by tractors digging up the very same stretch again. Almost like someone wakes up one morning and says - guys, you know I think we forgot to put in the drains? Or guys remember all those black cables we dug up last month apparently they are for telecoms services and no one in Lekki has been able to make a call since. We better dig up the road and bury it back pronto. Or L arry did you ever find that Timex watch you lost? I have a funny feeling it is buried under the road. Let's have a looksie shall we?
To make things even worse the company then takes out an ad in the paper a couple of days ago putting the blame for the fiasco on everyone else but themselves. They blame Lagos State, the Police, LASTMA and everyone else for failing to hold up their end of the bargain. I may not be good at Geography but I do recall a saying I learned back at school that says only a crap tradesman blames his tools. O.r others. For a crap job
The heartache caused by this fiasco on a daily basis is almost too much to bear. Forget about making plans. For where? Fixed time appointments. No way. "Rushing out" to get something. Dream on. The worst part is that the fear of getting stuck in the traffic is so high now that we just prefer to stay at home. Which leaves us at the mercy of PHCN, the Water company, the tax collector and every other crackpot and shaman peddling their wares.
So welcome to the HiLife. HiTech? Indeed.
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7 comments:
I was in Lagos last year and was caught in that traffic a couple of times. You don't mean it is still unfinished? Na wa oo.
Don't let me start on "low-tech" O, I live in Ajah, I know, I know, it's the end of the world, however some of us can't afford Phase I, where the "big boys" live.
One of the many things that winds me up about them is that when you pass a work team, there are always more people standing around than working, always.
Then there is the fact that they have spent 2 years building a bloody toll gate, which they want to activate before finishing the road.
But what can a man do, Hi-tech and "His Excellency" are joined at the crouch. So they employ east Europeans who should be building "faceMeIfaceYou" as engineers and project managers, hence what we have to live with.
What you should do is move to VGC use the Ferry service and have your car waiting on the other side every morning. which hopefully we shall start doing from Ajah.
Tunde just epitomised all that is wrong with us with his 'what can we do' attitude. What if as a people we all block that excuse for a road? I don't live in Lekki, thank goodness, but my madam's best friend does, and the other day we had to pay her a visit. With me behind the wheel...
@Tunde- you are right. The big boys live in Phase 1. I see them every morning with thier convoys driving the wrong way agasint traffic or even better reversing at high speed all the way down Admiralty. These are the leaders that we are meant to look up to.
You are also right about the HiTech muppets. Invariably ten of them will be standing around whilst two do the work. And what is wrong with working through the night to avoid peak time disruptions? They are a perfect example of how not to build a road. And if rumours are right that Asiwaju is one of the owners then thatt just goes to show that he is screwing us twice.
That tollgate will actually be the downfall of HiTech as if you read the garbled response from their MD in that stupid ad in the paper a few days ago it is all about "we won't open it until the road is completed". What he means is the road leading up to the toll gate. Anything after that and you are on your own as long as you have paid.Well let him try. They will really see the true face of Lagos then.
@Chxta - I really am revolutionary level at this stage with these people. Just yesterday I was just about to get out of the car to clear off the stupid plastic barriers they have used to block off access to Phase 1 but realised that with the kids in the car I could not afdford a showdown with the LASTMAN muppets gathered in the "control booth" . But trust me it is coming soon.
And trust me not living in Lekki. You aint missing nothing. A huge residential estate and no one thought to put in a park? some recreational areas? laisure activities? multiple entries and exits?
Had a shoot in VGC recently so drove there everyday for one week and this was at the peak of the fuel crises. It wasn't funny. Those Hi tech guys,hmmm, we're all waiting for the toll. They punish us for years then want to make us pay for it? We shall see.
I was just there yesterday on my way to Chevron. Took an hour from the Law school (or 1004, whichever is first) to get to first roundabout. I thought driving from Isheri to the Island was hell... I have repented. But really, for such a big name, denoting in some sense a foreign company, they are pretty daft. Constructing roads in broad day light and not putting in effort to finish on time. Lagos doesn't need expansion of roads, we need multiple parallel roads and recreations centers.
Don't these dumb asses know they are creating more problems. The road will work for 6 months tops as anyone going anywhere say Lekki 1 to Lekki 2 has to come back to the same main road instead of some by pass to relief the traffic. Toksie, is there a hidden road somewhere I don't know off? I won't tell, I promise.
@BMC - oh how i wish there was a hidden road. oh how i wish i did not have to use the sandy beach road which is slowly but surely destroying my car and making money for the area boys who surround the area like vultures waiting for any unfortunate ones whose 4x4 might actually trun out to be 2x2.
Oh where is Fashola when you need him most? This is a slow descent into hell. I had this fantasy today of bombing the toll plaza as they seem very focused on that side of things. They were fitting ACs to the booths can you believe? Meanwhile I dont see a single light on the new road?
Why do we continue to accept this?
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